recent posts

Game of Thrones – The Red Wedding Spoils or Shocks...

Lots of fans are upset. Their favourite characters have been killed in a gruesome manner on a TV show and they didn’t want that. Another group of these fans is upset that the deaths of the characters were spoiled for them by Internet spoilers from another group of fans who had already read the books that the show is based on.   Confused yet?   Yawn – what a bunch of imbeciles. It’s these miserable rainbow-weeking smilathon puppets that are ruining TV. They have already destroyed the film industry. Whoever came up with the idea of test audiences deserves a red wedding of their own. Why appeal to the dumbest and most common of mindsets? Why pander to the morons. Art should tell us something about life. Life is not all happy endings and nice glossy gloss glossing everything. The game of thrones is not pandering to the wailing goons who want everything nice and neat and tidy where the good guy wins at the end and the bad guy gets his punishment. That is not life. We have to take the security blanket away from the deluded ones and show them what life is really about. In the game of thrones episode, a good guy and his mother, KIng Robb and Catelyn get killed surprisingly and in the most gruesome way possible. There is betrayal and pain and horror and the fantasists don’t want that. Ironically this fantasy television show is trying to get them to confront real-life issues, to stir their emotions beyond the latest Massively Multiplayer something or other they are wasting their lives in. More...

XBox One announced – So what?...

This is going to be a short article. Microsoft introduced their latest gaming console today. Pardon me – Did I say gaming console? Apparently the Xbox One can do a hell of a lot more than play video games. Perhaps it should be called the “no need to ever go outside again” console. Yes, you will now be able to do everything using the Xbox One, I am not going to list its features because as I said it can do everything and that would be a long article. Congratulations to MicroSoft as they take another step on their journey to conquer the world, no doubt tieing you in to all sorts of binding agreements with other softwares or subsidaries of theirs while you use their everything box. But you don’t care right? You ain’t going outside ever again. Let big bad Microsoft have the world while I hop around the living room pretending to hit a tennis ball at some kid in China, who despite being 4 years old is handing me my ass. The future – isn’t it wonderful! Don’t buy this, and more importantly still, do not buy this for your kids. Read a book or go outside, meet a friend IN PERSON, there are less buttons to press, I’ll grant you that, but you do sometimes get this weird buzzy feeling – I think it’s called...

Yahoo to Take Over Tumblr

Oh goodie – another corporate takeover, this time in the information business. Pretty soon we’ll down to three or four companies running the world, and that guy in the Austin Powers movies who sits around stroking a cat and screaming “One billion dollars!” (about how much Yahoo paid for Tumblr by the way) may not be as far from reality as you may think (Rupert Murdoch, we are trying desparately not to look in your direction). Anyway as ever, money talks and as ever someone is getting rich (Tumblr guys) and someone else is getting more powerful (Yahoo) and all the while, the guy in the middle, the normal joe on the street, that being you, is going to get squeezed by the narrowing of choice in networking platforms and the growth of monopolising virtual behemoths. You see when the likes of Google, Facebook or Yahoo take over some other company everything changes. The company is subsumed into the internet giant that bought it and the dreaded terms and conditions are altered according to the draconian and interfering preferences of the internet giant. They are basically saying, “Listen we almost own the internet at this stage so you’ll give us permission to do whatever we like with your information or you can go offline for your kicks”. A lot of lip service is paid to data protection rights and so on but the internet is essentially not policed and the big boys can do what they want. Do you honestly believe some data protection official is going to stand up to a big bad internet corporation? And even if...

Amy’s Baking Company Self-Destructs Online...

Amy’s Baking Company have just thrown an online tantrum – a kind of corporate version of that famous YouTube video where a young girl hysterically urges the world to leave Britney Spears alone. Come on – you’ve seen it surely! For the two people in the world who haven’t – then check it out here Anyway whatever happened to that girl, maybe we have the answer here at NewsBruise – maybe she has become ABCs PR Consultant. I can imagine the conversation: Britney fan: Listen Amy, whenever anyone on Yelp or Reddit trolls us with nasty comments, we must immediately respond and show them who’s boss – that’ll teach them. Amy: Sounds like a plan! Yes Amy, the dumbest plan in marketing history. First of all Gordon Ramsay says you guys don’t listen so he won’t help you then the usual online poo-stirrers throw a few insults your way and what do you do? You dignify the whole sorry spectacle with your self-righteous, self-aggrandizing remarks. “We are great, Shut up losers!” is basically your calculated and strategically astute response to online criticism. That’ll sure quieten them down – make sure everybody is on message and Boom! ABC – Do you know anything about Yelp and Reddit? Do you know these people basically criticise everything? These are sites to let off steam. If everybody responded as you did to online criticism the world would get sucked its own self-righteous arse. People go on these sites to let off steam. To compound your error, you then proceeded to do what all people who have been caught out publishing something online that...

LinkedIn to ban users promoting escort services or prostitution...

How is man or woman supposed to make an honest buck these days? LinkedIn has just changed its terms and conditions so that any of their users who attempt to promote escorting services or prostitution will have to take their services elsewhere. Why LinkedIn Why? You seem intent on kicking these honest-to-goodness hookers far from your respectable corner of the web to the dingier, darker and seedier parts of the websphere. LinkedIn is trying to put forward its respectable face. Well, Mr. LinkedIn, nobody cares! We never had you down as a kind of professional brothel in the first place, now that you mention it though, what exactly are you trying to hide? Methinks that LinkedIn doth protest too much – why even bother to take this step? There are no kids on the site so the “think of the poor traumatized kids” line don’t wash. Here at NewsBruise our suspicion is that this move has been provoked by…….drum-roll please folks…….advertising partners, many of whom are funded by bible-thumping Republicans or Christian Democrats. Do they really have nothing better to do than kick a few escorts off LinkedIN? It is, after all, the oldest profession in the world and that in itself bestows upon it a degree of warped nobility that the millionaire preachers could only dream of. I think the prostitution racket will survive this savage blow while those who made this petty play will no doubt, congratulate themselves on their righteous deeds while sucking up cocaine at parties and hiring out the more exclusive ladies of the night (the ones so good they don’t even have to...

Really Funny News Story

I will put it here   Hahahahaha